Just Calling It Like I See It

Despite our good intentions to present the better part of ourselves, human nature can sometimes get the best of us.  I certainly don't have all of the answers and am still learning some of these lessons myself.  The following are not intended to imply that I qualify myself as an authority to judge others.  They are simply observations I have made based upon my own life experiences.

On Happiness vs. Joy:

Happiness is determined by external factors and is somewhat temporary.  A person may consider themselves happy when circumstances coincide with what they want or think they deserve.  When things don't go as planned; however, that 'happy' feeling fades and is replaced by negativity.  

Joy doesn't require a specific formulated environment to be present.  It is a state of mind and attitude - internal and constant.  

On Being Fulfilled:

Take ownership of what brings you fulfillment and learn to generate your own positivity.  Making someone else responsible for your own happiness is unreasonable and selfish.  Blaming others for your poor attitude puts a continual drain on those around you and leads to resentment.  

On Character:

An excellent litmus test for determining someone's character is to gauge their reaction when they don't get their way.  Adverse circumstances have a remarkable way of revealing someone's true nature.

On Negativity:

Don't complain about the same problem repeatedly.  People are usually willing to listen sympathetically and give advice about a legitimate concern.  If you choose not to take that advice; however, it becomes wearisome to go through the cycle of rinse.wash.repeat.  If you can fix it, do so, otherwise you are being socially abusive to those that tolerate your negativity.  

On Giving:

Giving to others from abundance or while benefiting from it becomes a matter of convenience, not generosity.  Being unselfish requires sacrifice.

On Relationships:

Respect, trust and love should never be taken for granted.  They must be earned.  To maintain the privilege to keep them, it requires dedication and commitment.

It is easy to say I love you, but the demonstration of that love through daily actions speak louder than any words ever could.

On Women vs. Men:

In an argument, a girl that resorts to crying is the equivalent of a guy losing his temper.  Both are coping mechanisms, yet our society feels sorry for the girl and penalizes the guy.

There is no difference between a girl going on a date with a guy expecting him to  entertain her, and a guy eating a home-cooked dinner the girl made and not offering to help clean the dishes.  Both take the other person for granted by contributing nothing.

Women demand the same equal rights as men, but resort to using the excuse of "I'm just a girl" when it fits their agenda to be selfish and not step up to the plate.

On Conditional Love:  

Others tend to love you as long as you fit their idea of who or what you should be or if they don't feel like your personal growth is somehow detracting from their own success. It is a selfish love that insists on boxing you in to conform to their own limitations and fears. 

I believe a truer measure of real love is when someone encourages your fulfillment at the risk of you potentially outgrowing the relationship.  It is fortunate indeed if you find someone who strives for their own growth as well as encouraging you in your own - this leads to a more balanced and fulfilling relationship for both of you.

On Personal Beliefs:  

For most people, their chosen faith is based upon what their parents believed and the geographical location they grew up in.  Life experiences may or may not change their view. Regardless of influences that led them to their choices, everyone is entitled to their own personal perspective.  It is important to understand the difference between acknowledging our individual opinions and attempting to coerce or influence others to accept our beliefs as their own.  You can preach at someone all you like, but unless they believe what you say in their heart, your efforts are wasted and become more about your ego than any desired conversion.

I don't profess to be associated with any particular faith, however:

I believe

in common courtesy, decency and respect for all mankind.

I believe 

in treating others the way I would like to be treated.

I believe 
in giving people the benefit of the doubt, until they prove they aren't worthy.

I believe

in doing the right thing, even when no one is around to acknowledge it.

I believe

in not toning myself down to make others more comfortable with their own failures.

I believe

in not letting my fears define who I am.

I believe

you should keep trying until you succeed.  If you don't, you'll always regret it.

I believe 

that appreciating what I have is crucial to maintaining a positive attitude.

I believe 

that being an excellent caretaker of what I have been given leads to being given more.

I believe
that while life is not always easy, it is always worth it.
I believe
that something worth having is worth the risk it requires to obtain it.
I believe
that when things get hard, you set your mind and keep going.
I believe
that everything you experience teaches you something, if you are willing to learn.

I believe
people can change the world, even if it is only one persons world.
I believe
this state which we call life is a beautiful gift.

Rika

**The below video is of a favorite instrumental remix.  This young man is very talented - this particular piece leaves me feeling positive every single time.  Enjoy!**

Red Lemonade Remix - Ronald Jenkees

“The greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances.”  -Martha Washington

"Life is what you make it.  Always has been, always will be."  -Eleanor Roosevelt