The Stature of Superman

The strength of a man isn't measured by his muscles, it's measured by his heart. In a society where real men of character are few and far between, Charles stands head and shoulders above the rest.

During three years of dating, I discovered most men lacked character and compromised their values in one form or another. Instead of getting involved with someone who didn't quite measure up, I opted to stay single, keeping my high standards and peace of mind intact.  After spending twenty years in an emotionally stunted marriage, I cherished my independence - it was just too valuable for me to settle for less.  

I wanted More - until I found what I was looking for, I was content to be alone.

Enter Charles - aka Superman.  Good-looking, intelligent, well-spoken, charming - I was convinced he was too good to be true and would let me down. That was three years ago and I have yet to be disappointed!  In fact, he still surprises me with the depth and exceptional nature of his love and care. He certainly isn't perfect, but from day one he has proven to be genuine and real, earning my loyalty and respect.

From the start, he proved he was different than the rest.  Instead of objectifying me physically, he invested copious amounts of time and energy into getting to know me on a deeper, heartfelt level.  He understood that I was distrustful due to past relationships, and actively sought to earn my trust. In a unique relationship where he could easily treat me as second best, he honors and dignifies my place in the household as a 'wife'.  Desiring only what's best for me, he encourages me to find personal fulfillment.  He has helped me communicate more succinctly and taught me more effective ways to resolve conflict. (for more on this, read Tools for Loving).  

Tender and sweet, he can turn an ordinary errand into a romantic date. Although he prefers to show his warm, playful side and loves to tease, he is vigilant and quick to fiercely protect those in his care.  He treats Marie and I with respect, providing the boys with a positive role model on how to treat women, and frequently offers to help with household duties so we have more time to relax. An excellent father, he spends quality time with the boys, giving real life advice as they grow into strong young men.  

If each of us gave just a little bit more, there would be enough for everyone. He believes strongly in this statement and leads by example, selflessly.  Even when he is exhausted, he will lend a helping hand where needed.  He doesn't demand or take my love for granted, and works every day to earn my heart.  I don't have to go back twenty-four hours to find something sweet and kind he did to demonstrate his care.  If you happened to pass him on the street, you would be struck by his strong, handsome build, but what strikes me is his big, beautiful heart and the forever kind of love I see shining in his eyes.  

Who wouldn't want to be the one he loves?  He may be an ordinary man, but he's my Superman.

Rika

**Below is a love letter and a song Charles sent me recently.  Just an example of the unique love he gives every single day.  You can read more about his idea of romance on his blog, Test Life.**

Jamie Cullum - Love Ain't Gonna Let You Down

I am not loving you casually.

I am not loving you incidentally.

Nor is my care for you one of immature unkempt thoughts, nor simple physical attraction.

I am loving you fiercely.  Head on.  Chin up.  Straight forward.  

Unapologetically.  Religiously and Romantically.  Playfully and Practically. Honestly and Hopefully.

I've been practicing to love you all my life.

An Olympian for Love. A triathlete, your champion. 

Faster, smarter and more than any other man you have ever known.

I will take on all challengers - and knock them down.

All save but one.  Death.

((And if I can find a way to break that curse--I'll fly through that, too.))

So please stay close.  Breathe with me.  Hold my hand and follow where I lead.  

Dip when I do and stand when I stand.

And I will get us through this life.

But I can't do it alone.  I need your help.

I need your spirit and promise and your Everything, if we are going to make it.

Together.  Intact.  Happily and in Love.

For I have no greater function, no other mission.

To this, I am dedicated.

To this, I can make my promises and assure you of deliverance.

So that on the day that you finally lay me down, 

my body broken, steel no more.

You will kiss my mortal lips one last time,

wiping tears from my eyes as the sparks shimmer and flicker out in them.

And whisper, 

"Well Done, husband.  You have made good on your word. I have loved and been loved well. Now rest.  Sleep and wait for me."

And when you arrive,

I will be waiting,

Having pushed all black space and stars aside to make a path for you.

Fiercely, arms out and ready to catch you, 

and do the impossible all over again.

Charles

Flying with Superman