What Would Jesus Do?

I've been an athiest for several years, yet I remember the Sunday School lessons from my childhood quite well.

Jesus, when speaking to the crowd anxious to stone an adulterous woman to death, commanded, "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone."  Of course not one person in the throng met this qualifier.  The conservative Oklahoma GOP candidate who recently said that "stoning gays is the right thing to do" must have forgotten this particular Bible story when he made such a brazen statement!

While this is an example of intolerance, not everyone is so blatant in their discrimination of social, cultural and religious differences.  Some are hypocritical, being polite to a person's face while harshly criticizing them behind their back.  Others simply use avoidance, refusing to engage with those who hold opposing perspectives.

My own parents have cited their Christian faith as validation for annihilating our familial relationship because they decided they couldn't accept my poly-partners, Charles and Marie.  It would appear they have confused common courtesy and kindness to others with 'condoning' something they disapprove of!

While the question of God being real is often subject to debate, if Jesus were alive today, how would He handle the situations that are deemed unacceptable by social, cultural or religious standards?

In Jesus' day, spiritual leaders were the highest members of Jewish society. They strictly upheld the law and traditions of their time.  Since everyone looked up to them, they avoided 'sinners' and the outcasts of society in order to maintain their clean image.  As Jesus preached the Good News and His ministry expanded, He inevitable came into personal contact with these same 'undesirables'.  There are several instances where he incited strong criticism from other spiritual leaders of the time.  They didn't agree with him breaking societal taboos, cultural bans and tradition in order to spread His message.

One instance where Jesus broke these taboos stands out.  

The Woman at the Well.

Jesus and his disciples were tired and hungry and stopped midday to take a break at a well.  While Jesus rested by the well,  his disciples went into a neighboring town to get food.  As Jesus waited, a Samaritan woman came to draw water from the well.  He asked her for a drink of water, which prompted an ensuing conversation during which He shared He was the Messiah.

In His encounter with the woman at the well, Jesus broke three Jewish customs.  First, He spoke to a woman. Second, she was a Samaritan.  The Samaritans were a mixed race hated by the Jews, not only for their cultural mixing, but because they had their own version of the Bible and own temple. Third, she was shunned by the other women of the area for her immorality. By drinking from her jar, Jesus was therefore considered ceremonially unclean.   Knowing her history however, He still engaged in conversation, which shocked her.  Even his disciples misunderstood Him, not fully grasping that His message of Love was ultimately for people from all walks of life.  

Our human tendency is to judge others because of stereotypes, customs or prejudices. Some Christians, claim deep concern for the 'sinner's salvation yet refuse to even speak to, or be associated with, the actual 'sinner'.

Exactly how does that work if their goal is to 'reach the lost'?

What would Jesus do?  
He would treat people as individuals, visiting their homes, eating dinner and mingling with them, demonstrating love, compassion and acceptance.

Mom and Dad, I urge you to reconsider the line you've drawn in the sand. There's some things here we could probably discuss. 

Rika

Kindergarten for Adults

As related to social, cultural and religious differences, there are some who view tolerance in an undesirable light.  These individuals seem to feel that tolerating those with differing perspectives implies they've betrayed their own viewpoints and instead, aligned themselves with someone else's beliefs.   

Tolerance is necessary for us to cohabitate and coexist peacefully in a world of diversity.  It's what we teach our children in elementary school.  Are our self-identities so fragile that we risk losing them by being open to understanding that which we may not agree with?  

It costs us very little to show kindness and respect to one other.  It can eventually cost us everything, however, to insist that everyone else is wrong and we're the only ones who are 'right'.  

   

             Planting the Seeds of Peace: Exploring and Celebrating our Differences          

If young children can grasp this concept, what's our excuse as grown adults?

Rika

Clearly, I'm in Love!

In 2010, I met the man who would blow the competition out of the water....

Permanently.  

The family that would change my life in the best way possible...

Forever.

After four years, one might think we were past the 'honeymoon' phase, and well into the 'tolerance' phase.  By now, given the challenges we've had with family members on both sides, we could've easily caved under the criticism of our uncommon relationship. 

Instead, our bond  has strengthened and our commitment to one another still stands.  The positivity and joy you read in my articles aren't empty words, they ring true even today.  

Take tonight for example; a weekday evening filled to the brim with happiness.

Marie and I planned an impromptu mini-trip for next weekend - to a local amusement park. We took a similar trip last year - just two friends thoroughly enjoying each other's company. We fully expect to have just as much fun this time around! 

Our daughter and granddaughter dropped by for a short visit; both mother and baby have grown over the last several months.  Karana has adapted beautifully to her new role as a parent.  Her daughter has to be the most adorable little girl ever born!  But then, as a first-time grandma, I'm understandably not one bit objective in that regard!  The baby kept us laughing delightedly as she smiled and cooe'd, exploring the first floor on hands and knees.  

Our son woke up from a nap, coming down the stairs - groggy, tall and handsome.  He was shorter than my 5 foot frame when I first joined the family; now he towers over me, learning to drive, getting excellent grades in school, developing strength of character.  His little niece took one look at him and scooted after as fast as she could, stopping at his feet to smile up at his face. It's the kind of thing that makes your heart grow two sizes too big!

This weekend, our other son will visit, regaling us with his latest thoughts on music, video games, and his new prospects for girlfriends.  His gift for dynamic conversation will be a welcome addition; he has a knack for adding a lot of energy to a party!

For now though, the house is quiet , everyone gone to bed.  Charles and I are sitting in companionable silence at our computers,  each writing blog articles.  (See his latest article here)  Soft music is playing in the background, and our crazy little cat is chasing one of her toys around the living room.  

The peacefulness of the room resonates deep within my heart.

I love this man, thoroughly and completely.  Respect the honorable way he conducts himself as a man of character, keeping every promise he's made to me since Day One. Fiercely proud of the way he takes his responsibility as a father to heart, being a parent first, but also their friend; the way the children respond to him.  Admire the fact that he successfully nurtures fully realized relationships with two different women in the same household.  I've never felt shortchanged; quite frankly, I feel more loved and valued than I ever did in twenty years of a monogamous marriage.

It's a good life.  Rich.  Full.  Vibrant.

Clearly, I'm in love.  On a deep and soul-satisfying level.  

Below is a beautifully eloquent message Charles recently sent to me, referencing the vows we exchanged last September.  There wasn't any special reason he wrote this - it was a workday morning in the middle of the week- but that's exactly how his love works.  

Just Because.

Rika
_________________________________________________________________

clearly.

4.16.14

I was clear and of good mind

When I took your hand in our field, and slipped those rings over your fingers

Then said the words that pledged my Oaths and Truths

- that as long as you would be willing

I will stand for you, fight for you, love for you, live for you

For as long as this world will allow. 

I was clear and of fine heart

When I kissed your lips and made my choice

That I would give and share with you, need and want of you

Be the man you would love, living as the man you can

Relentlessly tender and Fiercely engaged with you

For as long as your heart will allow.

I was clear and deeply in love

When I made you my wife and bound my soul to yours

Then drove you home, knowing that I would

Stand before you when you need my strength,

Walk beside you when you want my time

And lie down with you, when you call for your man

For as long as this body will allow.

And to all these things, I am committed willingly and in great joy

In good mind, fine heart and deepest love, clearly

Now and Evermore

For as long as this life will allow. 

- C.D.

Tips for Christian Witnessing - from a Former Believer

Unquestionably, each individual is entitled to their personal beliefs and chosen path in life.  For Christians, in an attempt to convert the unbeliever, their faith requires them to share the 'good news' - to witness. This is generally understood by non-believers, who don't object to simple sharing -  unless the conversation requires that reasonable discussion is abandoned in favor of dogmatic sermonizing. The latter becomes negative dialogue that effectively neglects another important tenant of the Christian faith, as found in 1 John 4:7-21....to demonstrate Christlike love.

I'm one of those Athiests who grew up in a Christian family.  Looking back at the thousands of hours I spent in church, I realize something critical.....The church focused on 'edifying' the believer and conveying the urgency to save the lost; providing little training for the practical application of actual witnessing. The believer left the church service feeling positive and 'blessed', pumped up to convert the sinner from the error of their ways, but unequipped to accomplish this goal.  While I no longer subscribe to their belief system, it does pain me to see their genuine efforts hampered by the practice of ineffective methods.

I'm not claiming to be an expert, but I've been both the giver and intended recipient of the Christian message. This makes me very familiar with how the message is conveyed and how it is received.  Now that it's aimed at me, I see some of the areas where believers are tactically failing in their approach.  I've learned some approaches are more successful than others when trying to lead someone to salvation.  The following tips are shared in hopes of promoting positive dialogue between the believer and non-believer.

A few key factors are crucial:

1. The believer should have some type of relationship with the non-believer.  "I'm concerned for your soul" comes across as decidedly disingenuous when there is no ongoing interaction or connectivity present.

2. Give the non-believer a reason to be receptive to the message.  While no one is perfect, the believer's lifestyle, words and actions should be in alignment with their message.  Preaching love and forgiveness while demonstrating anything but effectively draws attention to just one singular truth - hypocrisy.

3. The believer should know what they believe and why.  Citing "I believe the Bible because it says it's true!" may be sufficient reason within the Christian community; however, it's meaningless to someone who doesn't believe the Bible in the first place!  Additionally, it stands to reason that anyone would immediately question the viability of a singular source used to verify its own validity.

4. Quoting scripture verses does not work like a magic trick. Repeating scriptures over and over to convince the listener rarely results in them experiencing a sudden epiphany.  Also of note: many former believers have been exposed to these passages countless times, and do not receive them as new, and therefore relevant, information. 

5. Nix the Gloom and Doom.  Some Christians resort to the tactic of 'hellfire and brimstone' to scare their listeners into conversion.  What believers may not realize is that this approach is perceived as bullying and and an attempt to coerce out of fear. If becoming a Christian is such a celebratory decision - be positive, be joyful and share the good news!

6. It's not about church attendance.  A common misconception among believers is that the non-believer just hasn't been to the 'right' church or heard the 'right' pastor.  Church may have its place, but it shouldn't take a particular sermon or environment to convert someone.  Besides, Christianity isn't one single point or perspective, it's an understanding.

7. Learn more than one 'sales' approach.  If a particular angle isn't working, don't get angry or defensive, and by all means, don't resort to attacking the listener's character.  Know your audience, and simply try a different tactic.

8. True conversion is from the heart.  Be wary of mistaking compliance or acquiescence for actual conversion.  Someone that converts due to peer pressure is not rooted and grounded in their decision and will just as easily backslide.  Until head knowledge becomes heart knowledge, it's not genuine understanding.

9. When all else fails - demonstrate consistent and heartfelt love.  People of every background are drawn to light and warmth - I can assure you it goes a very long way, speaks louder than words, and emphasizes the sincerity of your heart.

10. It's not for Everyone.  Personal beliefs are just that, personal.  Despite the most heroic attempts to convince others of their need for an eternal Savior, it is a decision that must be left to the listener. It is important to remember that the obligation is on sharing the message, not actual soul conversions.

Ultimately, as believers and non-believers, there will be times we must agree to disagree, and follow our separate paths.  While we can debate the question of an unknown and unconfirmed afterlife, let's not get so caught up in being 'right' that we waste precious time on what is known.

Our Here and Now.

As Charles is often quoted as saying....."Everybody, just play nice."

Rika

Divine Miracle or Bug Poop?

I came across this article the other day while browsing the internet.  While I'm sure the lady in the article is quite sincere, even her fellow parishioner disagreed with her assessment.  It did give me pause to shake my head; I'm quite certain a few Christians let a chuckle or two escape their lips, as well. 

(Article posted as-is, source listed below)

Catholics believe liquid from 'miracle' tree is God's tears

People pray at tree outside St. Johns Cathedral in Fresno, California, say tree weeps God's tears
Experts: Tree drips with bug excrement, not tears.

As the mid-day sun beat down, a group of parishioners huddled under a tree looking for shade, but seeking a miracle.

Rosemarie Navarro, a parishioner at a Fresno, California Catholic Church says, "I said my prayer and asked the Lord to give me a miracle cause I'm really, really sick."

Navarro counts herself among the believers, a small but growing group that thinks the liquid dripping from this Crape Myrtle tree is the tears of God.

Parishioner Maria Ybarra says, "When you say 'glory be to God in Jesus name' the tree starts throwing out more water."

On close inspection, arborist Jon Reelhorn agrees, something is falling from the tree in front of St. Johns Cathedral. But it isn't water.

"The aphides will suck the sap, the sap goes through the aphid and then it is a honey dew excrement from the aphid and it gets so heavy in the summertime that it will drip down," Reelhorn says.

He calls it a natural process. He also found another tree dripping across the street. And like the honey dew rolling off its leaves, clinical therapist Mark McOmber says the way people choose to interpret it can also be attributed to nature.

"Human beings inherently need to hope for things, things that they can't understand, things they can't see," McOmber says.

Miracles are nothing new in Christianity. In fact, their origins can be traced back to before the time of Jesus. But for catholic Miguel Beja, this tree doesn't qualify.

"For me it is a natural thing but for some they say its different," he says.

Maria Ybarra was the first one to feel the drops this Wednesday and whether they are aphid waste or water, she believes they're divine.

"I can tell you looking at it from a scientific standpoint and a spiritual standpoint it is the work of God manifesting here on earth," Ybarra said.

Parishioners say the water started falling on Wednesday.

Source: sott.net

Answered prayer?  You be the judge.  Two people can view the same situation and have completely different perspectives.  

Depends on what they're looking for...

-the truth, or something which will justify their beliefs.

Rika

The Question of Morals

Disclaimer:  The following is personal opinion based upon my own life experience. If you find it offensive, please remember my articles are, as always, optional reading. 

I was born into Christianity, and spent my growing up years as a pastor's daughter, living both in the states, and later overseas as a missionary kid. When I was younger,  I accepted my parents' faith as my own, which was normal and appropriate.  Children often adopt the religious views of their parents; geography and culture also play a role in determining the acceptance of a particular faith or absence thereof.  As young adults, however, we are exposed to more of the world, and acquire new information. This allows us a broader perspective with which to determine our own path in life; subsequently, our views may or may not change.  

By the time I was an adult in my late thirties, I had moved completely away from religion and considered myself a dedicated Agnostic.  I met the Dashings several years later, who also happened to share an Agnostic/Atheistic view. Since the entire family loves to engage in lively debate and approach controversial subjects from every angle, my spiritual background, combined with their own perspectives, continues to inspire fantastic philosophical discussions! 

Coming from a religious background that witnessed both sincerity and hypocrisy among its saints, I was genuinely impressed that the Dashings, as non-believers, demonstrated exemplary Christian values.  Growing up listening to a plethora of ministers and sermons, I had always been taught that the 'fruits of the spirit', (love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control - Galatians 5:22-23) were the direct evidence of becoming a Christian. Of course, I realized these traits weren't specific to people of faith - if that were true, it would mean all non-believers were mean-hearted jerks! 

Truthfully, though, I had never personally seen such practical application of these values so successfully demonstrated on a daily basis.  In the absence of religion, they are not borrowing these qualities from another source, nor is there any struggle to do the right thing - the Dashings simply live it because these qualities are intrinsic to their hearts.

Since leaving the faith, I've recognized a common misconception among Christians: that a lack of faith in a higher power results in the absence of a moral code.  They seem to think that non-believers, Athiests in particular, do whatever they want and whatever feels good in the moment, simply because they don't believe in the consequence of hell. 

Sound illogical?  It is.
To assign a person's morality based upon their religious preference is highly presumptive.

Morality is defined as 'principles concerning the distinction between right and wrong or good and bad behavior'.  With all due respect to Christians, the Bible doesn't own the 'corner on the market' regarding morality, nor does being 'saved' equate to behaving like a responsible adult.  If that were the case, we'd see less believers make an embarrassing mockery of their faith when their own immoral behavior is made public, and plenty of ex-believers who suddenly become hellions or common criminals the moment they leave the faith.

Of course, since we're all imperfect humans, misrepresentations are bound to happen. However, loyalties to a particular creed should compel one to be a positive role model whose actions correctly align with his or her message. Convincing arguments in favor of any religious preference should begin, and end, with reasonable, logical discussion - leaving the name-calling and finger-pointing where it belongs - on the kindergarten playground.

In the end, how we treat others who are different is perhaps one of the best indicators of our moral condition, and the true nature of our character.  

Rika


Excerpt from I Corinthians 13

1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. 13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

The Family that Plays Together

I've written often of one of our favorite family activities - video gaming; that activity has taken on a whole new meaning lately! Starting on New Year's Eve and every day since, we've become wholeheartedly immersed in Final Fantasy XIV, considered by many gamers to be one of the classic MMORPGs. An MMORPG (massively multiplayer online role-playing game) differs from a regular RPG (role-playing game) by the sheer multitude of online players, and the fact that the virtual world continues to exist even when you are offline and away from the game. This particular game has several different 'worlds', with the capability of concurrently housing at least 325 thousand online players.

Charles, Marie, and the children played an earlier version of this game for over 2 years! This may seem a bit mind-boggling, but it's a deeply social game with intricate layers and networked activities, which deepens your commitment to the game long term. In discussing whether our family should play the newest version together, I was initially intimidated by the thought. I'd never played an MMORPG before; additionally,Charles and Marie described the game as a 'jealous girlfriend' who got upset if you decided to spend your time otherwise engaged.  I'll tell you the truth, though - turns out my 'jealous girlfriend' isn't so jealous after all, because I willingly give her plenty of time and attention!

As adults we prioritize our household and family responsibilities, but after the work is done, the gamers in us take center stage! We set up in separate rooms on the 2nd floor, and play every night after work/school, and most of the weekend too. Sid and Karana play from their respective homes. When they come over to the house, after we've visited and caught up, it's common for them to jump online and join us IVL (in virtual life) right from our living room!

The spirit of teamwork is a key factor to this game and one of the reasons we love it so.  For instance, while my main character is a gladiator whose main goal in battle is to distract the enemy while others in the group conquer it, cooking has become my favorite side job.  By consuming meals before an important battle, our characters boost our skills and stats.  Marie's main character stays busy healing us when we are wounded, so specialized meals allow her to utilize her healing abilities more effectively. Charles' main character is a archer who keeps a keen eye on all enemies on the outskirts of a battle, eliminating them before they cause detrimental harm to the group. In his down time, he enjoys relaxing and fishing from beautiful streams, and makes a point of supplying a variety of fish for me to use in my recipes.  Kaz, Sid and Karana each have different skills that allow them to not only be an important resource during battle, but also handcraft beautiful clothing and armor for the group, thus increasing our success rate with the protection these high quality garments provide.

It's been a fantastic bonding experience for the entire family, not only in IVL, but IRL (in real life) as well.  While we do utilize the game's communication method via typing into a group chat, more often than not, we're jumping up from our room, crossing the hall and poking our heads in each others' doors, eager to share a particularly gorgeous scene, dope set of armor or newfound helpful tip.  Echoes of "Check this out!", "Have you seen this?", "Did you know you could....?", and "Can you help me with a mission real quick, please?" ring throughout the house - accompanying the sounds of battle and the game's beautiful background music! We'll take snack breaks together and run down to the kitchen for nourishment, sharing our latest adventures while we eat, then breaking off with, "Gotta get back to it, c'ya!" The resulting cacophony is a beautifully organized chaos that makes it feel like one big family dorm party!

In real life, things continue to go remarkably well:  Marie recently had a meaningful visit with her family out of state; Charles is involved in reconnecting to his parents through emails and visits to their home; Kaz is bringing home excellent grades; Sid is working and also going to school part-time; Karana's little family is doing well; our granddaughter brings us smiles and giggles with her latest accomplishments, and I've received a significant promotion at work. 

As you can see, our family shares an unusual connectivity and success rate, whether it's IVL or IRL.  We always have -- and I firmly believe we always will, for we've formed the habit of shellacking the love we share with daily kindnesses and positivity.  
No matter what the activity of the moment, whether it's gaming, family vacations, or outdoor activities, we create and experience many beautiful memories together! 

This latest game just happens to be the tool of the moment for family bonding, and we are having a fantastic time!

I'll be back soon to write more articles, but for now, my game is calling!  ^ ^

Rika

The Inner Workings of our Poly-Relationship

All poly is not the same - there are different styles, dependent upon the consensus of the people involved.  Some who practice a polyamorous lifestyle may decide to date other people as they choose, with the full consent of those in the core relationship.  For Charles, Marie and I, we have committed to a policy of polyfidelity -  a closed and exclusive relationship between the 3 of us. At some point down the road, if we meet the right person who fits our family dynamic and is able to pass a series of stringent filters, we may consider adding a fourth to our relationship.  Not because we need it, but because we could responsibly manage and enjoy one more person to love. Any addition is a future unknown, however; in our Here and Now, we are fulfilled, busy and content.

In our current relationship, Charles is what is known as the 'V' or hinge.  I am physically and romantically involved with him, and while not legally married, I'm treated with the genuine respect and loving adoration of a wife. This is with the full approval and consent of Marie, his first wife of 23 years; they have their own rich and deeply bonded relationship as well.  This means Charles works diligently to maintain two fully realized relationships simultaneously - and does a fantastic job of it, too!  Marie and I have a heterosexual girlfriend relationship that continues to blossom and flourish daily. Together the 3 of us are each others' best friends, life partners and companions.

To those considering such a lifestyle, you'll definitely experience an intricately layered relationship which is difficult to replicate elsewhere.  If you're open to evolution and growth, you'll find all the joys I speak of in The Value of More, How Does that Work Exactly?, Why I Chose to be the Other Woman; however, that joy isn't automatically part of an all-inclusive ticket to 'Disneyworld'.  A poly lifestyle takes plenty of 'elbow grease' in order to reap any benefits.

Adaptability to this type of relationship requires certain key ingredients:

• A strongly rooted sense of self-identity that isn't based upon external circumstances or other people's opinions of you; while current laws are changing, at this point, society is not willing to recognize a 3rd or 4th partner in the relationship as a 'real' spouse
• Receiving constructive criticism without getting defensive or emotional; you can't let your ego get in the way when someone is simply trying to help you
• Allowing your partners to lovingly assess and identify areas where you need improvement (and doing the same for them); it becomes ludicrous to blindly insist there isn't a issue when you've got not one, but two people telling you there's a problem
• Being willing to put in the work and invest in a great deal of communication. In these relationships both the successes and the stumbles are shared with all involved, and when necessary, discussed and examined in detail
• A personal set of filters that help you rise above the routine emotional crises and "bad days at work"; it's not fair to place the burden of that nonsense on your partners. Instead, see those relationships as a reward, not a towel.
• An ability to not only handle, but facilitate unity by allowing your partners to spend time together without you. Understand that the group relationship is only as strong as the individual ones within. Each is crucial to the growth of the family unit
• Feelings of sincere compersion when you witness the ones you love embracing or kissing; if allowed to foster, feelings of jealousy and insecurity can be the downfall of a poly relationship. Compersion - is the opposite of jealousy. What a beautiful thing to have in your heart!
• Taking ownership of your own fulfillment; discover and pursue the things that bring you joy - don't expect your partners to complete what you lack within yourself
• Effectively communicating what it is you want and need; no one else is inside your head but you and can't be expected to read your mind
• A solid sense of independence that allows you to appreciate time alone; the intense nature of a poly dynamic means everyone needs space to occasionally retreat
• neediness must be replaced by emotional strength
• A strong sense of teamwork, generosity and unselfishness; this requires replacing 'I' with 'We' in order to find the best possible solution for the greatest number of people

While a poly lifestyle is very rewarding, it takes plenty of communication and hard work to transform that communication into action that yields results.  But is it worth it? Absolutely and unequivocally!  Our own relationship has grown so much that we hardly recognize ourselves. Situations that would have stopped us short three years ago are but bumps in the road these days; we're able to resolve issues quickly and efficiently as a cohesive, seamless unit. 

The usual response I get when sharing my story is, "It's okay for you, but it's not for me." 
That's reasonable - I understand it's not for everyone, just as traditional marriage, a same sex partnership or the single life isn't for everyone. Personally, I didn't know that such a thing as poly even existed seven years ago, but it's proven a richly fertile ground for my own personal growth.  This lifestyle suits me to a T - I'm content, fulfilled and growing daily.  Now that I'm here, I can't imagine anything else, and would find it challenging to go back to what society views as a 'normal' relationship.

My reply to the above question?  "You'll never know until you try!" Regardless of your relationship status or what the future looks like to you personally, the most important thing is this:  Know who you are and what you want out of life. Then, work towards that goal. Who knows, you may find yourself in a poly lifestyle one of these days! 
After all, anything's possible if you realize an open, loving heart and keep moving forward. ^  ^

Rika